ACTIONS

Although it is quite difficult to define "Love" we often use it frivolously. We direct this word towards our favorite singer, actor, athlete, and even our car. Although one may argue that they can love these individuals who are unable to love them back, I suggest that the feeling lies between fandom and obsession. You may be a fan of Beyonce, but to truly love her or be loved by her involves a relationship, but most importantly it involves action. Love is an action word. Someone who loves you feels responsible for your happiness. Someone who loves you will take action to relieve your pain, support you through your storms, and supply the necessities you lack. In fact, someone who loves you anticipates what you need and helps you meet those needs. During a casual conversation with someone who loves you, you may mention something you desire and that item will be delivered or hand-carried to you. If you fail to see actions from your friend or significant other then I dare say there is no love. Many of us have such a hunger for comradery and friendship that we do not notice our love is being manipulated. We will display the actions of love while all along, the friend or romantic interest is reaping the benefits. Many of us have purchased companionship with our own acts of love. Just to fill an empty space, we will shower someone with the love they don't deserve while receiving absolutely nothing of value in return. We have all matured to no longer have the need to fit in or always be included. It's time to choose carefully who shares your space and time. I am not saying it isn't ok to have lunch with acquaintances, but you must understand that if it is your nature to display love through actions, you may have to limit the time you spend with "receivers" and not "givers.” Ladies, a man will continually return to a place that is beneficial to him. In fact, they will continue to try and return decades after that relationship has resolved. He is returning for the actions of love demonstrated by you. Stop and think for a moment and try to remember the actions or lack thereof they displayed while you were together. Men, women will return to a place where they feel safe and supported. You can easily interpret her attendance as love when what has happened is that you have helped heal many of her past wounds inflicted by trauma. Stop for a moment and see if those actions are returned. Are your needs anticipated? Does she know what you need or what comfort you need? Love is an action word. Just as movement does not denote progress, the recital of the phrase "I love you" does not always mean you are truly loved. It's time to reevaluate. You deserve reciprocity, and you should not settle for less. #changedmindschangelives #bethesunshine