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As we continue this journey of changing our mindset, I have to remind you that changing your mindset will involve changing your environment or your crowd.
So, I want to pose the question, who really has your back? In order to evaluate that, we must first separate associates from true friends. Associates are fun, they are always available for cocktails, parties, cigars, and even wrongdoings.
On the other hand, a friend is someone who persists in standing by your side when the party is over and the harshness of reality sets in. They are the individuals that will not only help you out of the hole but will dig a tunnel for you.
There is a story in the Bible where a paraplegic was unable to get through a crowded house to be touched and healed. As the story progresses, his friends carried the man and his pallet onto the roof, tore the roof open, and lowered the man to the feet of Jesus to be healed. Notice that the friends did not jump in themselves because they were totally enmeshed with the needs of their friend. They displayed true selflessness.
These pallet carriers are the bar we should set our friendships by.
Are they willing to sacrifice so you can be healed?
Are they willing to traverse obstacles to help you reach your destiny?
Can they recognize your needs and act on the solutions?
If the answer is "no" to any of those questions, you are surrounded by associates. An associate will "sympathize " with you, meaning for a moment they will feel sorry for you. A true friend is empathic which means they choose to feel your pain, share your pain, and seek to take it away.
When you can finally identify true friends, you will surround yourself with them because they become copilots in your journey to reach your goal. A friend will work out and eat healthier with you while an associate will order pizza and wings and offer you some while you struggle.
It may be a controversial statement but
associates are ushers to your relapse, they will happily get into the mud with you because if you are both dirty you are now on even plains.
True friends or pallet carriers carry you toward your goals even by using their own strength where yours have failed.
When is the last time you were isolated and the phone rang and the voice on the other side said " I'm just checking on you to make sure you are ok"
That is a true friend. The distance didn't offend them, it concerned them.
If you can call one person a lifetime friend you are lucky, if you can count two, you are blessed.
So, today I challenge you to evaluate who you are surrounded by.
Are they carrying your palette or are they just hitching a ride?
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