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It has been studied and proven that competition brings out the best in human beings. When individuals are posed against others in fierce opposition there is an uncanny physical and mental response that pulls innate qualities that we didn't know we harnessed. It is commonly known that in regard to track and field lanes 7 through 9 are the most undesirable. It has been said that the inability to see your competitors, most importantly the faster competitors in lanes 3 through 5, has a negative psychological effect.
The inability to see your foe diminishes the competitive nature and thereby does not unearth those adrenaline-driven qualities.
Studies have shown that physical effort increases significantly when a person is placed in a competitive situation. Reaction times increase, strength increases, speed increases, and stamina increases. However, the same study shows that competition will have a negative effect on cognition and memory. Competition can drive you to do your best momentarily through the injection of adrenaline but has no sustainable advantages on your mental capacity.
Competition does not help you in the workplace or the classroom and it definitely does not help you in your social circles, in fact, it produces an adverse effect.
What if we discovered that the very absence of competition brings out the best in us physically, emotionally, and cognitively?
During a recent golf trip, I had the pleasure of spending the day with three men. I was well acquainted with all of them, but the three of them had just met for the first time on that day. All of these gentlemen are at the top of their game vocationally. They have PHDs, they own businesses, they own real estate, and are very well regarded in their respective communities. An interesting thing happened during the tournament, they never mentioned their positions, their salary, their successes, or their titles, and we never kept score.
We chose not to compete, not just in regard to the game, but in all aspects.
Over the span of a four-hour period, these men shared transparencies, weaknesses, anxieties, and stressors that never would have been disclosed in the midst of a bravado-filled competition or therapy session. The lack of competition brought out the best in us.
Men have always been taught that their career, their money, or their women define them. Since we were children we have compared our adventure people and our big wheels to see whose was better. This simply built walls of falsified narratives that we carried into manhood, causing us to inflate our position, our salary, our stature, and more importantly our ego.
“Sometimes the best way to see the authenticity of a person is when they are uninhibited and not heavily guarded by ego and competition.”
Dr. Darren L. DuBose Sr.
We always want to demonize Delilah who deviously discovered and divulged Sampson's weakness, but have you ever considered the amount of comfort and peace Sampson was experiencing in order to divulge his deepest secrets? He felt comfortable being transparent and vulnerable because he was not in competition.
“The only way to be our best self is to be our authentic self, a self that is void of competitors, haters, and dream killers.”
Dr. Darren L. DuBose Sr.
I challenge you to surround yourself with people whom you can comfortably share your shortcomings, fears, and vulnerabilities with. People who are not in competition with you. That's when you will become your best self.
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